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[skitter]

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[skitter]

What steps have you taken?

[tarakan]

I have burned through people. I tell Command that I need human trials in order to continue research. They provide subjects. I inject them with the virus, use them as incubators, and monitor their process. If they die? Pity. But I start again.

[ Hilbert is keeping his voice deliberately calm, deliberately neutral as he talks. He isn't showing any hint of emotion: an obvious choice he's making. ]

Your method of burning through people would undoubtedly be different than mine. But I see how you value control. And you admit yourself: you are cliche supervillain. I wonder if you too have burned through someone for the greater good.

[skitter]

[There's a pause. Taylor actually checks her hands, but the hair-thin scars around her palms disappeared overnight - they aren't open and bleeding now. So she takes a silent breath, takes a second to send the sunken-heart feeling from what he said off into the swarm, and then her tone can be normal when she continues.]

Myself, mostly. Learning that I hold the matches is a big chunk of how I suspect I graduated.

[tarakan]

Interesting.

[ His tone is still the same composed neutral as he asks, ]

Wonder what will be trigger for me. What will I learn to graduate.

[skitter]

[Yep, she is totally past that. Whew.]

For me, an important thing was looking at ownership. Who owned the problems I was trying to solve? Who owned the responsibilities I was taking on myself? Why was I taking on ownership of things much, much larger than myself?

[tarakan]

[ Well that's an easy one. Because everybody else is a short-sighted idiot who can't see the potential that he does. Next question! ]

I passed on my research to others before I died. I am always open to collaboration should opportunity present itself. Doubtful that looking at ownership is needed for my graduation.

[skitter]

[Yeah, that's where she stood too, if less consciously so.]

Collaboration is still keeping your hand on the wheel, Doctor.

[tarakan]

This is my life's work. Understandable that I would like to keep my hand on wheel—most in my position would.

[skitter]

And that's the ownership.

[tarakan]

[ Hilbert lets out a small little 'hmmph' before, ]

How picky were you when you decided who to hand things off to?

[skitter]

When? When I died? Or after my deals?

[tarakan]

Whichever you have answer for.

[skitter]

I have made exactly zero choices about who picks up what I'm leaving. I'll do my deals, and then I have a whole different world I'm going to go meddle in. I don't even plan to check how it goes.

Honestly, I'm more concerned about who I'll leave in charge of the greenhouse.

[tarakan]

That is where we differ. I know I will go back to own world after I graduate.

[skitter]

It took me ages to even figure out what I needed to work on to graduate. Got any ideas?

[tarakan]

I do. Graduation obviously does not mean you have to fully change as person. Daniel Jacobi is still same asshole that he was when we first met.

[ Which is VERY strong language from Hilbert. But in his defense, wow is Jacobi an asshole. ]

Biggest arguments back home have been with regards to my research. Human trials, lack of consent in test subjects, et cetera. If I mitigate those concerns, find new ways to continue research, and understand why everybody views my methods as bad, should be enough.

[ Half points, buddy. ]

[skitter]

Oh, yeah. He's one of my favorite assholes on the boat, though. Spending time with him is a blast, and I'll miss him.

[Taylor grins, pretty sure she can picture Hilbert's expression.]

Those are probably good places to start. Though I doubt you don't understand why people view your methods as bad.

[tarakan]

[ Talking about his own methods will wait for a moment as Hilbert points out, ]

You do know Jacobi murdered me.

[skitter]

I do. Sorry. I got- very casual about death, here.

He killed me once too. Caused my death.

[tarakan]

Some of us still have tethers and opinions to the non Barge world.

[ aka Hilbert is not very casual about death, what the fuck is wrong with people here. ]

After all, everyone leaves Barge eventually. Suspect that most will return to world where death is permanent. As it should be.

[skitter]

Should is very... flexible. I'm very grateful to have had the chance to come to terms with my own, here.

[tarakan]

You have come to terms and then some based on flippancy.

[skitter]

I'm sorry for being inconsiderate about your death. Scion knows my own first one is still a bit raw. Literally, yesterday.

[tarakan]

[ There's a long pause before Hilbert grumbles, ]

Did not even know it was coming. It was foolish, stupid death enacted by foolish, stupid man.

[skitter]

Would you rather have known it was coming?