"I wonder if I can get the Admiral to give an alert about it. A responsible fucking warden would give a warning," he points out. "But I don't trust that."
She shakes her head. She doesn't either. "I'll talk to... um. Anyone else I might be with. I can make sure I'm not alone."
That's going to involve telling more people about a very critical weakness, and she's not thrilled. But she's terrified of every second she might have to wait, trapped in that hollow, directionless hell.
He pauses. "Shit. The leprechaun. He can tell me. He'll know if his powers don't work, so he - he'll be able to tell me, even if the wardens do it sneaky. I'll make a Deal with him to tell me first and it should only last a second."
She exhales, and it's shaky. No, that won't do. Fuck. Everything out into the swarm, until she can feel her pulse slowing. Her expression is blank when she sits down at the table, elbows propped on it.
"It's for... riot control, I assume? In case we get out of hand?"
Coming back to herself enough to lean into him isn't easy, right now. And it means he can feel the trembling she's trying to push away. She breathes out through her nose, shutting her eyes, head on his shoulder.
She doesn't have to hide how she feels to him; he could have guessed it anyway. But he still holds her tightly, as if he can actually keep her safe here. "I'm going to fucking protect you, T. In the best way I know how to, okay? I know - it fucking sucks. And it's scary, but I won't leave you like that. I swear on the raven, on the magpie. I won't."
"Just... an hour, it only lasts an hour," she mutters, voice strained. She shuts her eyes for a second, but only sees the gray walls of Zero. They snap open again, her heart-rate increasing. This is ridiculous, she's never even been locked in there. Never been more than a few inches inside.
"Yup. Where else am I supposed to go?" he wonders gently. Lightly. "Except to stare at your fucking sleeping face for an hour? And then, after, we can complain about it so much."
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“Turns the whole ship into Zero. How long?”
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She had been in Zero for seconds. He doesn't want to think about an hour.
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An hour.
“I’d rather toll,” comes out before she can stop it.
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"Dad and I will take you to the infirmary for sure. They can give you something. Make you sleep."
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“I won’t be able to contact you.”
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That's going to involve telling more people about a very critical weakness, and she's not thrilled. But she's terrified of every second she might have to wait, trapped in that hollow, directionless hell.
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"It's for... riot control, I assume? In case we get out of hand?"
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"Not your choice. I know you wouldn't push it."
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"No. Never."
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"I'm scared," she makes herself admit aloud, voice low. It feels so selfish, to be afraid just for herself. Just for how something will affect her.
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"You'd stay the whole time?"
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"Want to sleep in the yard tonight? I can let out the fireflies."
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